As i lay my fingers on the keyboard, i have no idea what to say. Everything is in my mind. Everything that is true is in my heart. Yet i can't find the words for apologise, for happyness, for grief and sadness. I have no idea what to do anymore. My life went from perfect to really fucked up to okay, happening to confusation to here. Im back here again. The life i never wanted. To fight with bestfriends of mine just because of someone. To leave someone behind because of another someone. Why is all the blame on me when all i was trying to do is proof a point? Everything is backfired on me now and i have no where else to go.. Nothing else to do.. No meaning to the life i led anymore.

I miss you. This is so fuckingabsolutelyfuckingfuck hard. I never thought it would be this hard. Alone i still feel. Having him tell me tat he loves me and that he misses me. Can i still believe it like i used to believe once before?

I feel restless. No one can help me through this. I dont feel like i need anyone anymore to say anything about. I want to but i can't find the words to say anything anymore.

Im so tired.

Live. Tears. Stay.

Im sorry to everyone.. I'll be away till light comes back on.. Take care..

-fallen angel-