As if you have a choice.

I'm a girl who ONLY love people who love me
I'm a girl who ONLY love myself & friends
Oh yes, I'm taken, happily, :D

I want you to like me
I wanna have lots of ka-ching $$
I want someone i can really trust
I want my past to be forgotten
I want people to know i'm MIX not malay

Anis Nabilla .
Michelle .
Eshia Kar Mun .
Shafique .
Lily Zahara .
Samira .
Sue Hanie .
Denise Siau .
Farhana K .
Rachael Teng .
Li Anne .
Tevaneea .
Trisha Teo .
Aisyah .
Eleena A .
Juria H .
Tiffany .
Sonia A .
Beauty .
Jack Chan .
Sho Suzuki .
Vanessa .
ModelMaterials .

February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009

It's over and done with. You were the one i fell for over and over again. You were the only i believe every lie you told me. And when are you ever going to change? Is this the life i prepared for? No. I want a new life.

Layout: Kary-yan/Missyan.
Hosts: x o x

Friday, June 13, 2008

After all of the times that we tried,

I found out we were living a lie

And after all of this love that we made,

I Know Now you don't love me the same
The way that i love you.

I woke up kinda early today,

and something told me

from that moment it wouldn't be the same

Felt like you were hidin' something,

but I didn't push it,

I didn't complain or say nothing

I tried to act like I didn't see it,

'cause deep down I know

I didn't wanna believe it

One thing i hate about myself is being TOO EMOTIONAL for things that are unrelevant for. And i dont tell anyone about it. I sit in my room, the tears are non stop flowing from time to time and when i walk out of the door, i act as though i was okay all along. With him outside my door, with him standing around. I still managed to keep my tears to myself. Because if he were to ask me "why was i crying". I would have no answer to give because i dont even know why.

I wish sometimes i didnt went through bad experiences in relationship. I wish i didn't believe in karma and that one day its gonna hit me like a buller. I wish that i was innocent in the whole love thing and i knew nothing about it. Maybe then i would be able to trust to love, to not care about the things that are happening around me and just have positive thoughts for this relationship.

Im happy, i know i am. Sometimes i can look back and think what a great day i had, that's why im crying, maybe. Because i dont want to lose it so soon. And i feel like he's slowly slippin away. And i can't do nothing about it.

He's perfect. He's the best. It's never his fault when im in the bathroom crying. I just have a problem where when its something i dont like that is happening around me. I tend to cry, non stop. It's never his fault that i'm sad at night. Its never his fault that i feel so neglected somedays. Its just me and my stupid head that is filled with negativity.

No changes would happen.
This is gonna be here for a long time.

It takes time to heal.

And more time to be better again.

-fallen angel-

♥ 2:34 AM