As if you have a choice.

I'm a girl who ONLY love people who love me
I'm a girl who ONLY love myself & friends
Oh yes, I'm taken, happily, :D

I want you to like me
I wanna have lots of ka-ching $$
I want someone i can really trust
I want my past to be forgotten
I want people to know i'm MIX not malay

Anis Nabilla .
Michelle .
Eshia Kar Mun .
Shafique .
Lily Zahara .
Samira .
Sue Hanie .
Denise Siau .
Farhana K .
Rachael Teng .
Li Anne .
Tevaneea .
Trisha Teo .
Aisyah .
Eleena A .
Juria H .
Tiffany .
Sonia A .
Beauty .
Jack Chan .
Sho Suzuki .
Vanessa .
ModelMaterials .

February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009

It's over and done with. You were the one i fell for over and over again. You were the only i believe every lie you told me. And when are you ever going to change? Is this the life i prepared for? No. I want a new life.

Layout: Kary-yan/Missyan.
Hosts: x o x

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Why does tonight have to end?

Why don't we hit restart and pause at our favourite part

We'll skip the goodbyes,

And if i had it my way, I'd turn the car around

And runaway, just you and I.

That's half the lyrics from the song *he* gave to me. I just dont know what to do anymore.

These are the reasons why i dont wanna accept him again. Its for you to hear also:

1: I dont want to be a barbie doll, A barbie doll that you can just throw and pick up ANYTIME you want

2: I dont wanna get hurt again, Maybe she's not here now, thats why you feel lonely. But what if she comes back and says the same thing over and over again. What would you do?

3: The trust is not there anymore. And when the trust is not there, the relationship just goes down. Just like my previous relationship - sorry anis, if you feel offended

4: I gave my previous ex boyfriend so many chances and he took it for granted. He made himself think *shes so crazy over me, that whatever i do, she would accept*. I dont want you to think the same way as he does too.

-sorry anis, didn't mean to say it here, its easier if i put it this way. much apologise that im talking about ur bf.

The reasons why i wanna accept back also is :

1: I think he's the best boyfriend i ever had. He took care of me, didn't take me for granted, I think

2 : He understands how i feel. He knows all the crap i went through. He has patience for me.

3 : Im too lazy to find another guy out there, im sure i dont want to lose another guy, even though he might not love me only.

See, am i making sense or not? No right? I know. All my friends tell me,

*don't accept him back again, your gonna be a pathetic fool accepting him again, just like last time, how many mistakes you did last time, takkan you wanna go back to that life again?*

Yes, sometimes what my friends says is right, I think they are correct, But this time is different. Hes regretting for what he did. Hes not saying

*please come back to me, i really need you*

. Hes just regretting that he said that. that he made a choice like that.

That... oh well, I dont know la.

A day spent at my friends house, and yeah yesterday i dreamt about him also, its hard when i dream of him, and the dreams are like sweet. Its like really really sweet.

* i can't tell what is it*.

Moving on,

" I give you the chance, yes i would. but i dont think our relationship would be the same, if you still wanna risk it, then fine, i would risk it with you, but let me tell you this, if you ever hurt me again, i would hate you for the rest of your life.i would not be a friend, i would not be your advisor, i would not be anything to you, are you sure u wanna risk that? Risk a friendship for your love for me, If you still do have love for me la"

Gawd, help me.

-
fallen angel-

♥ 5:38 PM