-Snuff - Slipknot-

So if you love me let me go
And run away before I know
My heart is just too dark to care
I cant destroy what isn't there
Deliver me into my fate
If I'm alone I cannot hate
I don't deserve to have you
Ooh, my smile was taken long ago
If I can change I hope I never know

I still press your letters to my lips
And cherish them in parts of me that saver every kiss
I couldn't face a life without your light
But all of that was ripped apart...
When you refused to fight
So save your breath I will not hear
I think I made it very clear
You couldn't hate enough to love
Is that supposed to be enough?

I only wish you weren't my friend
Then I could hurt you in the end
I never claimed to be a saint
My hope was banished long ago
It took the death of hope to let you go

So break yourself against my stones
And spit your pity in my soul
You never needed any help
You sold me out to save yourself
And I wont listen to your shame
You ran away, you're all the same
Angels lie to keep control
My love was punished long ago

If you still care, don't ever let me know
If you still care, don't ever let me know

This song was introduce to me by Max Gill. He's a fan of slipknot, cardle of filth, and every metal rock bands. So yeah. Its the slowest song i have ever heard from slipknot. Fell inlove with it from the first strum of guitar.. Okay, The song doesn't really mean anything. But the lyrics is really apart of me. I dont really really understand what the song is really about. But im trying to understand soon enough.

I really should start getting my sleep house right this time. Im sleeping when people are awake and awake when people are asleep. Something is wrong with me. Im not eating right. Wait, scrath that. Im eating alot actually. Like a whole lot. About 7 times a day. I have nothing else to do. I mean i actually do. But i can't find anyone that can help me with it. But im trying to get through this.

The weekends was just a tiring day. Going here and there. On saturday i went to brickfields with Beverley, Ahbi And Pam. To find deepavali punjabi suit. The smell. I dont like it. But what to do? The punjabi suits were very very beautiful. I love the sequence on it. It was like only RM100. Beverley says its cheaper then last year. So we walked at brickfields for like an hour or so. Then reach KL SENTRAL. Where there was a deepavali festival. They were selling it like for RM50. The people selling the baju are really really funny. Their like "RM5O, come in come in come in. No need to buy also can, just come in and see. Fifty fifty fifty fifty fifty" And we were like laughing cause of the way they were saying it.

After that supposed to go to pacad's Open House. Then my mum told me i had a dinner with my cousins and stuff. I had to pick. But i haven't seen my cousins in like a bloody long time. And yeah. Its a family thing. So i had to skip Pacad's Open House. Im sorry brother.. So i had makan2 with the cousin's. Lepak2. Drank tequilla outside the house at like 4 am in the morning. Playing truth or dare. And making a story starting " Saya Sebuah Pencil". I swear to god it was so funny. Everyone had to say like 3 words and make it into a story. It was the most sickest story, where the pencil had actually been. Ewww. But that's Private & Confidential.

I guess i wrote more then enough. Not gonna write about what happen today. Totally regret what i did. Im sorry aunty. I didn't mean to make your house a place for that. Im so stupid. I should have went home. Seriously just stupid stupid stupid to the max. I should start changing, like seriously. Should start accepting the bloody fact. And everything else is not really fine. Im pissed off with someone but im not gonna show it. Its you and her problem now. I dont want to masuk campur anymore. Like seriously. No point. I just think that being drunk was not a bloody excuse. Thats all. Other then that, everything is good. =)

-Fallen Angel-

♥ 10:35 PM