Sometimes you might feel as though you wanna lock yourself in the room. Don't go anywhere. Just stay at home, watch the sun set, watch the sun rise, hear the raindrops, listen to songs and just relaxx. Sometimes you feel "how the hell my life end up at where it is now, it was so perfect before this?". Or " Why does teenage life have to be so hard? I wish i was just a small baby girl where my parents would do everything for me, this time i do it for myself". Im tired. Im really tired of the world. Yes im seventeen and im already tired. Just think if im 70, i think i would be rotten in my house with 30 cats. That's always my dream.

miss being in sri petaling again. Everything seems to right there, nothing really went wrong. Friends there by my side, not all the time. But when i needed them the most, i was sometimes the outcast but i made myself that way. Everything seemed so easy before. Go to school, come back, dance lessons, hang out at someone's house, go to the playground, swim in the evening, go home, online and then sleep. Seems easy huh? Yeah it was. I had everything i really wanted. Sometimes i still do feel as though i wanna throw everything and just move back there. But i can't. I made this life of mine, might as well live it. Just wanna say i really miss you guys, and i can't wait for Suet's Ling birthday party. Im sure as hell gonna be there.

Im tired of you. I seriously am. First you say you still love your ex. I let you with no hurt, no tears and nothing else. Second time you say you cannot love me because im too hard to be with. Again i let you, hurt abit, tears was there of course. But i landed quite okay. 2 weeks later, you say you never realize what you had till it was gone. I gave it another chance again, one day after our 4th month anniversary you give up on us and said you cannot do this anymore. I let you go again. My heart was hurting as much as a knife slashing through my legs. But i left it at where it was. Just left it there. Just didn't bother, and just walk ahead through life. 1 Week later, we're back on the track again and i never notice where it was really going. 5 months coming through, one day before our ANNI, you said you're not sure what you really want. You're not sure whether i am the one for you. I asked you over&over again, what do you really want? And you didn't say me. You didn't say anyone else. But you mentioned you're first love. Alright i accept it, i dont mind bcause im not over mine too. But i still love you from the bottom of my heart. Again, i let you go without thinking of doing something stupid. Just told myself that "everything happens for a reason". 4 days go past and now you're giving me a song "Fall for you - secondhand serenade".

Please stop all the nonsense if you're just gonna play me for the 5th time.

Im tired of being you're dog or whatever it is.

Im just so fucking tired already.